2008 – Year of the Nerd

Looking over the past years in blog, and throwing up a random comments to offer my contribution to the rapidly changing conversation going around me in the office: I've concluded this. Everything I wrote during my uni years and a little bit of what followed after were some good shiKt. Everything which followed was shiKt ShiKt. I am Jack’s literary pretention and disdain. I know why.

Elest said goodbye to 2007 bitching about mediocre fireworks on the London Skyline at Ally Pally, surrounded by Turks and Polacks. She made a few faces for the camera, to remember this auspicious Kodak moment of the end of possibly the shiKtest year of her life. She then said hello to 2008 falling asleep in the back of Shaheen's car. Basically, we celebrated in true style.

Being back? -I contemplate this as some volunteer makes sheep's eyes at me from in front of the HR department. Little does the kid know that I'm about 4 possibly 5 years older than him. Being back is a bit crap. It wasn't so bad at first because I was still on a high but I've realized one truth: As liberating and thrilling as it is to travel alone (the moments when I was completely by myself were best), it is the complete polar opposite on the feel good scale to be alone when back at home. This rat hole of a place was not made to be suffered without company or warmth.

We therefore have a predicament on our hands, which offers two alternatives. Find company or piss off out of here. But this is the year of the nerd; in which Elest remains asexual, grows androgynous, turns her nose up at fit guys and naively ignores the flirtatious advance of men around her. It is the year Elest concerns herself only with nerd things like books, manga, movies and all things to feed her imagination and creativity. This is the year Elest sees things through to the end and is stingy with her time because time is something, she's found, we, non of us, ever have enough of.

In the warmth of far away lands Pixy was heart broken to find that life is a cold, meaningless place. We grow up, grow old, and die alone. We lose the things we take for granted and realize their value. – Things like your testicles and your manhood. 'They took it all! They took my testicles! They took my manhood!' -raved the funny old, Norweigen man who no one knew at the Rajendra Christmas party. And though he was so light hearted about it, and everyone found it so funny, Elest smiled but only sadly. Apparently they picked him up at the bakery earlier that week when he'd collapsed. When they found out he was alone, they invited him to the party. When he asked later in the evening to take a picture with her and her friends, 'because I want to show that I was here' Pixy was even sadder.

And one more thing: To all those pretentious little white or would-be-white boys (this is not a colour, it's a cultural mindset) out there who fancy themselves artists, believe gender equality means making a woman pay for your drink, and don't know their own asses because constantly getting stoned, pissed and laid has not only left them with STDs and psychosis, but severe narcissism too: Grow up and get over your F***ing selves. Every such white boy needs to be dragged to some remote Kampong in the Far East, and made to use a squat toilet. Nothing to humble you like peeing in a hole in the ground, with malarial flies buzzing about your vulnerable behind, then having only stagnant, collected rain water to wash with afterwards.

-Sha, my love, this one's for you.