For Tasy, from the book we'll never publish coz it's probably too self-indulgent.

...See it all began in Stamfordhill, where a Scary Wicked 'Vat-To-Do?!' ruled a dingy little school with an iron fist. The first few days had been lonely, but then on the Friday of that week they sat the new new-girl next to the old new-girl and this is what happened several months later:

"YOU and YOU," fingers jabbing, "Alveeys making trouble! Alveeeys like dis!" Fingers making a fiddling gesture which is supposed to mean something, but the two terrified little girls forget their terror for a moment of mutual bemusement. "Dooon't look at each udder!" the terror returns with a vengeance.

It's gonna be fine inshallah, I promise.
It always has been.